(“Free-Flow Sessions:” Session 1) I sit here, drink to my left – Amaretto stone sour – a pile of fudge grahams next to it, and a bag of Lay’s potato chips to my right. I sit at Ed’s desk, plucking away at his laptop, a desperate attempt to push myself to “show up.” Another day of occupying myself as long as possible, only to find … Continue reading Reflections
August 3, 2019 I’d like to believe have no recollection of the path which led me from wilderness to desert, but I’d be fooling myself. I’d love to pretend I’m blind to the patterns of behavior that led me here, oblivious to the why and how, but I see it all clearly. A series of events; a string of low blows and wounding interactions actively … Continue reading Dark Truth: Battledoors
Flashback – March 24, 2019 What do you do when the wilderness swallows you whole? What do you do when there’s nothing left to say? When words have been forced out through fear and pain, only to fall short. Or worse! What do you do when disappointment and rejection steal your hope and faith in anything true and good? What are you left with? There … Continue reading Dark Truth: The Thief in the Night
August 1, 2019 I woke before the sun once again, nothing new, but certainly a reminder of my struggle. My mind and body are incapable of being on the same page; hell they’re not even in the same book. Some days, I sleep peacefully waking to a short reprieve from the incessant chatter, but most days it’s a race. A sprint to see if I … Continue reading Dark Truth: Energy Economics
The beginning: July 31, 2019 I sit here in silence, with the stark realization that this, this is the moment I’m meant to write about. For decades I’ve wanted to write “my story,” but I always thought my story was rooted in the past. The truth is, my story starts now, in this moment, because there is only now, and how the past effects the … Continue reading Dark Truth: The Desert
Fire Walls I’ve struggled for nearly a year; struggled to regain any form of structure and consistency. Struggled to ‘get through’ another season of physical and emotional exhaustion. Struggled to break old patterns and build new roads. Struggled to make connections deeper than a thimble. Struggled to commit to the things which bring me joy. But most of all, I have struggled to love and … Continue reading Dark Truth: Daily Journals (1)
You’re there, in my every breath and desire – lingering, waiting, and watching. I saw you there, tiptoeing the perimeter of it all, my life, and my world. Hiding like a predator in the darkest depths of consciousness. Someone should have warned me about you. I never saw it happen – I wasn’t prepared. I saw you in the eyes of others. I felt … Continue reading Dark Predators & Unwanted Passengers
I hear you whispering my name, summoning me with your heavenly essence. I feel you pulling me, showing me the way. I feel desperately disconnected and saddened that I’ve forgotten the feel of your embrace. I need to bathe in your beauty, immerse myself in the flowing waters of your baptism. I need to cleanse myself of it all, the dirt and filth of … Continue reading Rhythmic Silence – A Love Letter
Wherever you go, There you are! What does it mean to be mindful, to be aware, or in the overused words of this current culture – WOKE? The answer is most definitely a matter of perception and perspective – from what angle are you viewing the quandary of what it is to be mindful? For me, mindfulness is first the conscious choice to take notice. … Continue reading Soul Strengthening Hues – Mindfulness
I’m so tired of hiding. Do you want to know who I am? Who I really am? I’m the girl who found God and fell in love with Jesus nearly seven years ago. The girl that raps along to Eminem and sings ‘Bohemian Rhapsody’ at the top of her lungs. I’m the girl who desperately needs routine as much as I need a bit of … Continue reading Broken Mirrors & Empty Boxes
Simply Aubrey Elaine 